If the world goes up in flames and all that's left of 2023 is this article, let me get the record straight. Aliens, if you're reading, this is the definitive history of pop culture from the last 12 months. From the haunting presence of Mr Tedros Tedros to the end of Succession and its criticism of capitalism, nepo babies, and bland-but-not-benign middling men from middle America named Tom.
Succession
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It's taken the entirety of 2023, but we have just about recovered from the final episode of Succession. Quite possibly the most feel-bad television show to date, Jesse Armstrong's observations about the one per cent were absurd, depressing, and scarily accurate, especially when it came to the climax of who "becomes king potato". Special mention goes to the Instagram account @nocontextsuccession for inflaming the hype online (and giving our followers who weren't consumed by the politics at Waystar Royco an excuse to block our many story reposts). Is it rewatch time yet?
Rihanna at the Super Bowl
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Of all the various names Rihanna was rumoured to bring out onstage during her headlining performance at the 2023 Super Bowl (we were praying for Janet Jackson), none of us guessed it would be a baby in her womb. While it wasn't new music, Riri used the opportunity to announce her pregnancy, spruik Fenty Beauty, and play a few of her old songs while remaining totally unbothered.
Gwyneth Paltrow's ski trial
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If someone had warned me that this trial would set off endless think pieces about quiet luxury, I would find retired optometrist Terry Sanderson and tell him to stay off the goddamned slopes. ICYMI: Sanderson sued Paltrow over a ski crash in 2016 in a civil lawsuit he ultimately lost. Paltrow demanded he pay a symbolic $1 in damages in a countersuit, all the while dropping into court each day completely relaxed wearing a smorgasbord of expensive cashmere, The Row staples, Celine and Prada. It also gave us one of the most powerful farewell lines: "I wish you well".
The tyranny of Tedros Tedros
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If The Weeknd was a product, his stocks will have plummeted the moment he stepped onscreen as Tedros Tedros in Sam Levinson's objectively bad HBO series The Idol. The rat tail, the sleazy 80s Angeleno look, his foul dirty talk. We get that this was the point, but that doesn't help us try to scrub the visual from our frontal lobe.
Barbenheimer
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Box office numbers have been dropping for years. But thanks to heavy memefication and clashing release dates, people headed to the cinema in droves to strap in for a double feature of Barbie and Oppenheimer. The former grossed a total of $1.44 billion USD at the box office, while the latter reaped over $953 million worldwide. It will be interesting to see if Hollywood tries to replicate the phenomenon... either way, we're just grateful for any excuse to get Cillian Murphy and Margot Robbie in a room together.
Venus Retrograde
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During Venus Retrograde, it felt like celebrity couples were dropping like flies. Need convincing? Some of the couples to split during this period include Lucy Boynton and Rami Malek, Rosalía and Rauw Alejandro, Joshua Jackson and Jodie Turner-Smith, Anna Paul and Glen Thompson, Bella Hadid and Marc Kalman, Dominic Fike and Hunter Schafer, Sophie Turner and Joe Jonas, Taylor Swift and Joe Alwyn, and Britney Spears and Sam Asghari. It was an objectively bad time for love... or perhaps a blessing in disguise?
Matildas-mania
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I will never experience Beatlemania but I imagine it's similar to the hysteria I felt during the 2023 FIFA Women's World Cup watching the Matildas play – especially when Sam Kerr scored that goal against England in the semi final. Now, half of Australia are women's football fans for life, which can only be a good thing.
Tube Girl
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There is a lot that is categorically Hard To Watch on TikTok. However, the unbridled confidence of Tube Girl AKA London-based model Sabrina Bahsoon is something to celebrate. The 22-year-old went viral for original videos of her dancing, lip-syncing, and showing off her outfit on the London Underground, inspiring other commuters to do the same.
Roman Empire
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Apparently men think about the Roman Empire... a lot. Embarrassing for them, sheep. This spurred on a the rest of the internet's population to share their own personal equivalents, from Dakota Johnson's famous reproach of Ellen DeGeneres to that one time Bradley Cooper read Lolita to Suki Waterhouse in the park.
Hollywood Strikes
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2023 was the year Hollywood revolted in the name of better pay, safeguards against AI, and better working conditions. It took 148 days of striking for the Writers Guild of America to reach a deal with AMPTP, ending their collective strike on September 27, 2023; and 118 days since the Screen Actors Guild put down their tools to secure a deal with the studios. Read more about it at RUSSH.com.
Timothée and Kylie
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From the moment Kylie Jenner's car was spotted parked in Timothée Chalamet's driveway, the internet sounded the alarm that something was up. Is this just Kris Jenner at work or something far more insidious like... love? Who knows, but the only couple more jarring to come out of 2023 is Tyga and Avril Lavigne. We imagine their origin story went a little like this.
Beckham
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Posh and Becks skidded to the top of the talking pile when David Beckham's self-titled documentary came out in the latter half of the year. Besides reminding us of the couple's incredible style and playful chemistry, it also gifted us this humbling meme.
Troye Sivan
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RUSSH digital cover star, Troye Sivan, squeezed every bit of juice out of 2023. Sivan debuted his widely-loved album Something to Give Each Other, featuring songs like One of Your Girls, Rush, and Got Me Started accompanied by viral music videos and TikTok dances. He delivered a standout performance in The Idol, launched homewares and fragrance label Tsu Lange Yor, and to cap it all off, was the subject of Timothée Chalamet's SNL skit. Sign off Troye, you're done for the year.
Images: @evanrosskatz @evanrosskatz
