In life, when you're one inconvenience away from asking WWJD?, I like to shift my gaze from heaven... to the stars. Any problem, crossroads, or question can be solved (or at least settled) by a long hard look at your birth chart. Take, for example, the eternal dilemma of what exercise to try. While, the stars won't answer you with the desired "none," they will respond with a workout routine catered to the traits of your zodiac. And by the stars, I mean me. (Sorry.) So let's dig in shall we? Here's the exercise style you should do for your star sign.
Capricorn: Running while answering emails
No time to pick up a resistance band, let alone settle in for a 45 minute pilates class. Capricorn, we see you (and while we have you: slow down, unclench your jaw) and your ambitious schedule, with its minute-by-minute breakdown. You're likely marching on a desk treadmill while juggling a Zoom meeting and your inbox. It's obnoxious and distracting to everyone else in the office, but that's okay, whether it's in the title or left unsaid you're the boss around here, and who would dare question you? Though, you might benefit from Tai Chi.
Aquarius: Calisthenics
On your never-ending pursuit of knowledge, you somehow ended up down a calisthenics rabbit hole. Sounds about right. Run-of-the-mill workouts were never going to cut it for you anyway, whether it was fencing, your parkour phase or your fascination with aerialists. Now, you're learning to harness your body weight and – thanks to your daily updates on socials – ensuring everyone knows about it.
Pisces: Long, romantic walks on the beach
Exercise? While you're not opposed, life gets in the way and you struggle to be consistent. That being said, you prefer group classes as they allow you to invent elaborate backstories for everyone present. If you had to choose, though, it would be exploring a new city on foot or a long, romantic walk on the beach. Sure, those requirements are impractically specific, especially if you only have an hour to work with, but as an introspective Pisces it allows you to take the temperature of your thoughts and the world around you. Then there's the ample opportunity to romanticise your life.
Aries: Boxing
Alright, million dollar baby, it's a no-brainer that boxing and combat sport would be your best friends. You've got the stamina and the strong will. But boxing is as much about discipline as it is trusting your instincts, which will help rein in your more impulsive behaviour. Plus, it's nice to have an outlet where you can exhaust any pent up energy and aggression. You already have the Raging Bull nickname, you might as well back it up with the skillset.
Taurus: Shopping
Be real. A Taurus wouldn't open a jar of olives let alone be caught signing up to a run club. Just contemplating the idea is a Taurus exiting their comfort zone. Then how, you ask, do they raise their heart rate? I've got one word for you: shopping. Whether it's online or in person, nothing gets the adrenaline pumping like retail therapy. The next best thing is a swim-up pool bar.
Gemini: Gossiping
The thing about Geminis and sport is they're prolific. You'll find them captaining their local kickball team, enlisting people to join their run club and signed up as a member of the tennis club board. But the motive behind all these extracurricular activities is not, as it would seem, an unquenchable passion for fitness. Rather, a chance to collect and disseminate information, by which I mean, gossip. Nothing thrills them more, and how can you blame them when it's coded into their very nature?
Cancer: Mermaids
Normally it would be a big ask to get a Cancer out of the house. You'd have to bribe them with treats or coax them with a made-up crisis. However, at the mention of water they immediately perk up. Cancers are drawn to any sport that is water-related so surfing, cold water plunges, snorkelling – you name it. But let's be serious, it always devolves into a good old fashioned game of everyone's favourite childhood pastime: mermaids. Which is great because it doesn't require much, just you and your best dolphin kick.
Leo: Clubbing
Leo has no problem shining from the outside – and exercise is a chance to radiate on the inside too. As social creatures, the ideal exercise scenario for a Leo is planting themselves in the middle of the dancefloor and coming up for air only when the sun does. But it needn't be so public; romping around in your bedroom is just as effective. Clubbing, raving, and dancing in general is how a Leo connects with their body and taps into the sheer joy of being alive. This vitality is infectious. Cue Robyn's Dancing On My Own.
Virgo: Football
Eye-on-the-prize Virgo is best suited to team sports like soccer, netball – anything with a clear objective. You're tactical, which is why we'll likely find you standing before a whiteboard marking the opposition's strengths and weaknesses, and fine-tuning your own team's approach. You want to be of use and are happiest when you're exercising your capabilities. Plus, one of your biggest strengths is seeing the potential in any person or situation, which makes you an intuitive and encouraging team-player. And when things go wrong (no amount of preparation can prevent it) your team will pull you out of your own echo chamber of self-criticism.
Libra: Yoga/Pilates
For Libras, life is a balancing act. You're emotionally absorbent and confrontation makes you squeamish. By maintaining a regular yoga or pilates practice, you provide yourself a chance to block out the noise and check in on what you actually think and feel, and physically, where you're storing tension. You'll find you have a natural knack for the poses and shapes of yoga, given your innate understanding of symmetry and equilibrium. And yes, you're always the most stylish person on the mat. It feels important to mention that Gwyneth Paltrow is also a Libra.
Scorpio: Sex
Scorpios have no patience for the wishy-washy nature of the wellness industry. As far as exercise is concerned, however, you feel no particular way. Like eating, you recognise it's something you do to nourish yourself and feel good. Unless sex counts, in which case, it's your favourite way to sweat. And when you don't have a partner or are tired of going solo, pole-dancing is another fulfilling outlet.
Sagittarius: Bouldering
When it comes to exercise, the phrase "Jack of all trades, master of none" rings true for Sagittarius. Over the years you've developed many hyper-fixations, but dip off when beginner's luck is no longer on your side. At the moment, the problem-solving and strength required in rock climbing and bouldering is keeping you stimulated. You just need to maintain the enthusiasm for as your approach the more difficult routes.
